My Yahoo Dream

yahoodreamOwlsy,

This was posted by one of the members of my support group.  She gave me permission to share it with you, and wherever it might help, such as the blog.  Took me awhile to edit out all the junk characters, so I hope Yahoo doesn’t put them back in.

Donna D

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From: Judith
Subject: My Yahoo Dream
Date: Mon, 21 Oct 2013

My Yahoo Dream

Just as I was about to wake up this morning, while still in that middle territory between sleep and being fully awake, I had the following dream:

We [support] group members were sitting with each other face-to-face in a large circle inside a large room. It seemed that we were having a live group therapy session, something which is a private function intended for group members only and with strict rules about confidentiality. All of a sudden a bunch of clowns from yahoo came bursting into our supposedly private room. They were setting up lighting cables and cameras and sound systems. A member of our group, who had just started to share her story before these outsiders burst in on us, was waved on by the yahoo intrusion team and told, “Go on; pretend you don’t see us here.”

So the woman started to weep and speak about how her husband was leaving her for a younger woman from his office. As soon as she said that, Yahoo drones flashed a giant ad for match.com on the wall opposite the woman, so that the weeping woman could meet attractive singles in her area. A loud sound track accompanied the flashing photos of men. “Hi, I’m Troy. I like foxy older women.” “My name is Enrico. Are you my hot tamale?”

The woman wept more inconsolably as the roster of available studs flashed across the wall; the yahoo clowns were totally oblivious to the woman’s emotional distress. Next the large screen advertised a product to visibly reduce the signs of aging on the weeping woman’s face so that she could make herself more appealing to Troy and Enrico, while at the same time she helped generate more targeted advertising dollars for yahoo.

This was truly a win-win scenario according to the yahoo intrusion team. While the ads were flashing on the wall, and we literally were drowned out by them and could not hear each other speak, the yahoo sound system was broadcasting very loud cash register ka-ching! sounds as ad revenue came rolling in and was counted. Figures were flashed up on the wall in bright lights, rather like a Jerry Lewis Telethon.

As a couple more brave souls attempted to share their stories in the spirit of our original group, more ads aimed at them and their shares were flashed onto the walls, again drowning them out. After a few more attempts to be there for each other in our group turned out this same way, we silently stood up, joined hands, and exited the room, leaving the clowns from yahoo perplexed as their revenue stream fell to zero.

No more ka-chings! could be heard. The silence in the room was deafening. The yahoo clowns flashed confused looks to each other. Was that the way we were going to show our appreciation for the new, enhanced yahoo experience that they had crafted for us?

It would have been wonderful to wake up and say, “Wow! That was awful! Thank God it was only a dream.”

Unfortunately, it wasn’t.

Roxanne

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2 thoughts on “My Yahoo Dream

  1. Roxanne,
    What a magic post!
    Those in charge at !yahoo are brain dead so they won’t/can’t understand the distress they have/are causing, daily, to Group users.
    Stupid breeds/hires stupid.

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